This is my first time at the Embassy.I don't mind having to wait to see someone in The Ministry, but I hope the edict we are requesting will get pushed through quickly.
We want you to do something about the crappy abbreviations some subversive invented to express themselves on the internet. Our minds are too literal to take these in. When we see "lol" we think "lolligag" and when we read "roflol" we don't know WHAT to think. We do not roll on the floor anyway.
Please do whatever it is you do to make an edict into an edict and make this crap stop. If it involves an iron, forget it. We don't approve of those either.
Thanks.
M Club President
Here is our request IN WRITING. 
